by Robin Nobles
Sensuous writing is essential in the romance world. Descriptions of characters, places, clothes, food, flora and fauna, and weather must appeal to the FIVE SENSES. Think of it this way: you're painting a picture with words for your reader. You MUST paint vivid words that will allow your reader to see the scene through your characters' eyes.
1. CHARACTERS. The ability to write sensuously, that is, to create vivid word pictures that evoke emotional response in the reader, can be developed with practice and by studying the styles of various romance writers. Whatever type of scene you write, GETTING INSIDE YOUR CHARACTER, knowing how your character feels every step of the way, will help you create a convincing and moving scene. We, as writers, have the challenge of making our characters come alive. As you write, continually think about your five senses. What does your heroine smell? What does she hear? Does she taste the salt water on his warm skin? What does she touch? The "seeing" part is easy, but the other senses need to be used as well. Envision yourself walking along the seashore. One of my favorite authors, Rebecca Forster, told me to close my eyes and pretend I was there. Try it--it works! Do you feel the warm sand oozing between your toes? Do you hear the squawk of seagulls calling to their mates? Do you feel the sun beating down on your back? Feel the cool breeze blowing off the tranquil waters? Do you smell the ocean, the water, and the slight scent of ocean life? I heard a suggestion once that for every page you write, make sure you appeal to two of the five senses besides sight.
Make good use of "character tags,"--words and phrases chosen carefully to establish the character in the reader's mind. You tag characters with adjectives and phrases that give clear clues both to a character's appearance and to her other important inner feelings. Come up with concrete images that will immediately convey to your reader such things as her body type, her facial features, the quality of her voice, her mannerisms and gestures, her facial expressions, and the way she moves when she walks.
Examples: his voice was hypnotic, low, and throaty; she flicked her shimmering black hair over her shoulders; a smile that didn't reach his eyes; his dark eyes, burning with fire; her musical laughter; a lithe, swinging stride.
Consider listing the words and phrases you have used to tag your characters and establish them in your reader's mind. Keep notecards by your computer to remind you. Use specific words that carry color, texture, and concrete images.
Through this workshop, I'm going to use examples from the writings of Group #8's members. Here are a few:
His heart raced in tempo with the horse's hooves as they pounded the ground.
Gareth stood as still as a mighty oak in a light summer breeze.
One accidental glance at Dorrie, hovering under that bush like some kind of water-nymph, drove away every vestige of brotherly thoughts he was trying to have. His first playful reaction, reaching to give her a good ducking, disappeared in a wash of male response.
The long tail of his hair swished across his narrow hips as he turned his head. Nikki found her gaze drifting down to linger on the most gorgeous tush she'd ever seen. Classical dance had a wonderful effect on the male body.
She paused briefly, drumming her fingers on the top of the mahogany table.
She opened her door only as wide as her three chain locks would allow.
Jolie sighed heavily, then started slowly to the door, dragging her feet like a dejected child.
What does your character's voice SOUND like? Does the hero smoke? Wear expensive cologne? Smell like the vast outdoors? Is her sweater as soft as a kitten's fur? Bring your reader INTO your book by painting a vivid picture, through sensory images, of your characters. Let us hear the swift intake of her breath and feel the scraping of her nails down his back. Let us LIVE in the book with your characters!
Here is an excellent example from Rebecca Forster's book, GOLDEN THREADS:
Char was very close, her face tipped up just a bit, her lips invitingly near, her skin . . . ah, her skin.
Carefully he plucked a rose petal, rubbing it gently between his fingers as though to gauge its softness. Without hesitation, he drew it over Char's throat, slowly, cautiously, past her collarbone, down her chest to the point where her breasts rose with tempting fullness above the beads of her gown.
Char held out her silken cape as her body trembled with ecstasy under the touch of the petal. She threw her head back, her eyes fluttered closed, a gentle moan bubbled from her throat.
In a moment she had wrapped Fletcher in a mantle of black silk. Her mouth was on his, probing, insisting that they now finish what he had begun. His arms were around her, his lips on her flesh, following the trail that a single rose petal had blazed, following it with exquisite accuracy.
In this example, Rebecca pulls her readers directly into the scene with an amazing sense of realness. Don't you FEEL like you were there? Better yet, don't you want to plant ten acres of rose bushes???!!!
2. SETTING
You must not only be accurate as you describe the place you are writing about, you must also be able to bring it alive, appealing to the readers' five senses. Be selective and specific--but remember that you are NOT writing a comprehensive travel book
Important note here! NEVER let description interfere with the forward motion of the plot. Naturally weave aspects and descriptions of the setting into the thoughts, feelings, and actions of the characters. Scatter the facts along the story's path.
Examples:
As soon as she shut the door, the cab hurriedly pulled away, leaving her hopelessly alone in front of the large, split-level dwelling that was only visible by the generosity of the full moon.
Just a wheat field, a lone house and some graceful creatures keeping track of the eternal ticking of the universe.
Huge spots of old paint curled and peeled, like strips of inanimate flesh surrendering its soul to the baking Oklahoma sun.
A place where people waved at you on the streets, and not with their middle fingers. A place that was slower, more sedate. A place that was a throwback to the days depicted in Norman Rockwell paintings, where the general store served less as a general store and more of a place to commiserate with neighbors and friends.
The moon was full, lavish and silvery, and the sky was inky black, with a million stars overhead. The inside of the little cabin seemed to hug itself around her, all cozy blackness, except for the glow of the lights on the instrument panel. She could see the landscape below spread like another world, monochrome, shades of charcoal bathed in the bluesilver light of the full moon.
3. SCENES
How sensual is your novel? Do you make frequent use of all five senses? In portraying sex scenes, were strong sensual images used? Make sure your vocabulary is rich in words that make you feel sensuous as you write, and later read it. You might want to list the words you have used to create the sensual mood of the story. By listing the words, you will increase your awareness of sense imagery. When you see a potential heroine's beautiful hair, for example, think of how you could describe it sensuously. Does it shimmer? Is it silky soft? Is it the color of amber wine?
Let's work on a sensual check list here:
1. Have you described your heroine, hero, and other characters sensuously with word pictures that appeal to all five senses? Will the readers see the golden shine of your heroine's hair, hear the rustle of her silk skirt, feel the softness of her skin, and taste the salt air on the hero's skin?
2. Have you given all descriptions of the setting in sensuous words and phrases that create romantic pictures in the reader's mind?
3. Have you dramatized fully the action of lovemaking (depending on the type of romance novel you are writing) through plenty of description, physical and emotional, so that the reader can experience vicariously the same ecstasy felt by the heroine and the hero? Are your sex scenes a sensual and a sensuous experience for the reader, written to appeal to all five senses?
Additional examples:
This is a part of a scene where the heroine is on a horse and faints: Nowell heard someone call her name, but the dancing silver mesmerized her. She felt herself drifting, drifting. Silver. Gray. Shining lights. Sleep eluded her, pivoting through her head, just out of reach. Sleep, she begged.
Connor was stretched full length on her sofa, his long, bare feet crossed at the ankle. He'd discarded his shirt and wore nothing but soft, snug jeans and a shameless grin. Any other man would have been more than adequately clothed. But this was not any man. Nikki could feel a warm tension build low within her. Her hands began to shake and she tightened her hold on the mugs as if they were her only link to safety.
Silverstine's voice grew as taut and twangy as a high-strung banjo string.
She was stunned by the richness of his voice, its velvety-smooth texture lighting a fire hidden in her soul. Rekindling a flame that had been dormant so long that she'd forgotten it even existed. But what she noticed most was Jace's eyes: bluish-gray and storm, roiling with an intensity so restrained that she could swear she saw cirrus clouds gathering in their midst.
Cait's ebony eyebrows drew together in a scowl. For the umpteenth time tonight, she would attempt to ignore the chauvinistic comments of the arrogant waiter whose loud voice was currently barking uncomfortably close to her ear. A gleaming knife with a sharply serrated edge trembled in her slender fingers. She took a deep, calming breath before plunging the knife in the fruit tart in front of her.
Shay Colliers' plea ended in a whisper, his hands raised to her as if begging. Sass reached out without thinking, and took both in hers and they drew together until they were so close only a sliver of darkness kept them apart. She closed her eyes, feeling the roughness of his skin, the tenderness of his touch. Sass shook her head and raised her face to the cool night air. Even here, so far from the house, she could hear the odd pulse of the party conversation, the sudden laughter erupting from one guest then another. She had forgotten them all and she'd forgotten how Shay had talked that night. How could she have been so stupid?
Odam Lockheed -- He was born the seventh son to a poor family, and his father had been heard to say, "Oh damn!" when his mother told him she was pregnant yet again. Odam resented being poor, and vowed to change that fact before he died. That resentfulness made him a bitter man, one hard to get along with and a man not easy to give his love. But his looks! He had raven black hair and eyes the color of sapphires. A small white scar crossed his square chin, where he had lost a fight to one of his brothers. His body was lean and yet the muscles that lay under the skin spoke of power.
. . . Sass thought Shay Collier might kill her--or kiss her. Yet he did neither. He was so close she could see the fine threads of gray just at his temple, in the black beard that covered his jaw, in his mustache that lay over his inviting lips. She imagined it was square, that jaw of his, but not harsh.
No perfectly chiseled jaw could host lips that came together, even in anger, to evoke times past. Times of men who spoke in words that became poetry, and kissed, not to conquer. But to bring pleasure and make memories and capture a heart forever.