Wednesday - 20080213-2200 - Rain - Silver Rain, London Town; Social Security Check Arrival; Bill Paying; Back to Bed; Up Again - Daily Chores; Post Office - Commeratives; Lunch - Looking at Paint Color Samples; WalMart; Last Stop - CVS; My Immune System - Question of and about; Insurance

Rain - Silver Rain, London Town Larger Image

This image is from a site called A blinding flash of bliss - "Personal Blog filled with stream of consciousness writing on myriad subjects ranging from integral philosophy to transpersonal psychology, personal interpretations of spirituality."

It appears to be blog that falls into the single-page category with entries in reverse chronological order, ending at Friday, October 27, 2006 and starting at Wednesday, January 15, 2003. The photo is from Monday, May 03, 2003.

From a cursory glance, it is a fascinating attempt at self-realization. And I can not help but wonder why the writer stopped.

Images that capture rain in the act of raining and splashing are among my favorites. They offer something akin to a kinesthetic sensation - the ability to image the feel of the rain. In this case, hard, heavy liquid shots that pierce the fabric of clothing and hit the skin with a cold sting.

I was up early, around 0630, and one of the first things I did was to see if the Social Security check had been deposited into my checking account. And it had.

My next effort was to write checks for the unpaid bills; tear off the return section of the bill; retain the other section with a notation of check number, date and amount; insert return section and check into the appropriate envelope - making sure that the address appears in the envelope window; seal the envelope; write return address on the envelope; and attach a stamp. So many steps just "to pay the bills."

Two more steps to go though. I write the into a ledger, then place the retained section into the appropriate file folder. Well, actually, there is one more step: hiding the envelopes to keep the cats from playing with them. For some odd reason, they always find them a great item of curiosity and will quickly rip at the paper.

For the last several days, I've known that I have another in a long, long series of upper respiratory bugs, so the entire time I wrote checks, I really wanted to go back to bed. Which I now was able to do.

I woke after 11, but I didn't want to rush off to lunch without doing the usual and necessary chores. Clean the cat litter boxes. Put laundry into the washer. Make the bed. Shower. Shave. Dress. Check that I have everything that I need - including the bills, shopping list, magazine for lunch and a number of pamphlets of paint color samples and suggestions.

During the night, a dog had gotten into the garbage container next door, strewing most of it onto my front yard. So with trash grabber contraption in hand, I went about gathering garbage and debris. A "simple" task that took 30 minutes.

One of life's wee pleasures for me is buying commemorative stamps. They are such wonderful miniature works of art. I asked what was available, and the clerk showed me about ten options.

My choice was the American Treasures: Louis Comfort Tiffany. What a glorious image.

One of the other offerings was for Charles W. Chesnutt. My response was, "Who is that?" Her reply, "I think he was a writer." A Google result at Charles Waddell Chesnutt tells me he was an "an Afro-American man of letters." Google reveals a considerable list of links. Yet, until now, I was totally unfamiliar with him.

I've been taking various pamphlets about paint color samples with me to lunch for the last few days. I was hoping that a different viewing position might give me a new idea. But, alas, it has not. I'm still as indecisive as before.

My shopping list was not long but varied. I'm down to four pairs of sweat pants which are the perfect piece of clothing on a chilly night. But the only ones available were comprised of a synthetic fabric that didn't appear to be warm and fuzzy. I'll have to pay Hudson's a visit.

Last week when I was looking at the paint, I noticed they had the exact type of textured spray paint I've been using on the front steps. But my funds were low, so I hesitated to buy any at $8 a can. (At least, it was a $1 cheaper than those at Lowe's.) Today, I looked and looked but only found one dented can.Then I turned the corner, and there was a basket filled with nothing but different kinds of textured spray paint. And in the middle was what I needed at only $5 a can! A very pleasant surprise indeed.

I called the clinic yesterday to get a refill for GE Budeprion (for depression). And this morning, I'd called in two refill orders: G.E. Clonazepam (for panic attacks) and Lexpro (for depression). And before stopping off at WalMart, I rushed in to place an order for Factive (antibiotic).

I was expecting it to be several days before the refill from the clinic reached CVS, but it was ready. The total for these four prescriptions was $114. Does that not seem a tad outrageous! I've eliminated several drugs from my regimen, but I dare not cut out any more. What do people do who do not have insurance?

I would love to understand why my immune system acts the way it does. I can make semi-educated guesses, but there may be no way to be certain. My best estimate is that it's a set of interrelated factors that play off each other. To the extent that it become circular in nature.

No doubt, being born to a mother suffering from tuberculosis is a component. Tuberculosis she contracted from my father. Although she did not recontract the disease, he did. I think he suffered from various levels of it for ten years. As a kid, I have clear memories of the fear that I too might contract it.

It's not always easy for one person to understand another's state of physical or emotional health. That too plays a strong part. Especially in the working environment. At one time, I had a boss who, whenever I was out, would very vocally complain, "Is he out, again!" (Stupid cow!) I also had a boss who compared my condition to her husband's, and asked why did it take me longer to get over a problem. Well, all this did was to make me feel more depressed and cause additional problems. And this misaligned questioning went on until I decided to retire. In fact, it was one of the major reasons I quit when I did.

I've learned not to question another person's state of being. I never know what damage it might do. Alas, not all follow this maxim.

Yesterday, I saw an on-line article at "Health Insurer's Letter Seeks to Get Coverage Canceled" which stated "Citing an effort to hold down costs, health insurance giant Blue Cross wants doctors in California to report conditions it could use to cancel new patients' medical coverage, it was reported Tuesday." In other words, Blue Cross is asking physicians to tell about any pre-existing conditions that the company could use to cancel a patient's insurance.

However, the response was so negative that Blue Cross decided to stop making the request. "Calif. Blue Cross Stops Asking Docs About Patients’ Omissions". "After getting slammed yesterday by everybody from Arnold Schwarzenegger to Hillary Clinton, Blue Cross of California said it would stop sending letters to doctors asking them to help find patients who had failed to report pre-existing medical conditions to the insurance company."

The American medical situation is a travesty!

(In Wednesday - 2008-0213-2200 / Out - 2008-0214-0200) This entry was written in a single setting.

Pax! Erin go braugh! Je accuse...