Freshly mowed grass; "Starting at $0.01." "CreamHeaver" and "pattern files"

An uneventful weekend. Not at all unusual.

Saturday afternoon, the lawn lady showed up to rake and mow. I try not to be here when she does that, in order to avoid breathing in any wind-driven grass clippings.

This may be one of the reasons I avoid big outdoor events. Anytime there's a big outdoor event, the sponsors of the big outdoor event want everything to look spiffy. So what to they do the day before? MOW 'DE GRASS! (As I wrote this, I thought of six or seven big outdoor events I've left because of the freshly mowed grass.)

While she mowed and raked, I headed off to WalMart. My big splurge item was a new pair of cheap jeans. As I finished and pushed my cart toward the check-out, I noticed that all the self check-out scanners at the south end were closed. I wheeled my buggy around and raced back to those at the north end. All the staffed stations had long lines. The self-service stations had shorter lines. But every person in line had overloaded carts and screaming children.

Slowly I moved forward. And at last the scanner was mine. Loudly, I announced: "Back! Back! It's mine! Me! Me! Me! Screw the little people!"

When I got home, she was stilling raking. "What now?" I thought. Laundry? Over hill, over dale, to the laundry I went. I wash and dry. I return home. Now, she's mowing. I grab the laundry, run for the door, drop the hampers, lock the door and turn on the AC.

She mows and mows. Finally the mower starts making a retching noise. Sorta like the sound a cat makes before it throws up on the quilt your great, great, grandmother made in the 1880s.

She tells me she'll go home and get the other mower. I tell her not to worry. "Come back one day next week when you have time."

When you list a book, Amazon displays a screen that tells how many new, used and collectible are available for the same item. It also indicates the lowest price in each category: "23 used starting at $0.01." I don't undertand how someone can offer books for a penny. Amazon charges a flat $0.99 per item, plus 15% of the price. Although they allow $2.26 for shipping; in a case like this, the fees would come out of the shipping allowance, leaving you with $1.27. But you will still have to pay for shipping. Maybe they use pigeons. Or owls like in Harry Potter.

I did this about a dozen times. I think I finally decided I was trying to give two files the same name.

If that was not bad enough, in the afternoon, I created a "pattern" that was patterned on itself. Oh, me! Oh, my! Took me a couple of hours to unscramble that mess.

PAX!