Chop Sticks; Garbage Bags; Missing Parties; Hibernating

The first weekend of the new year. Tra la la la! Did I leave out a "la"?

Saturday I dilly dallied until after noon before deciding what I needed to do. Now that I think of it, I did finish reading the last two issues of "The Gay & Lesbian Review." It's not unusual for me to start reading something, put it down, start on something else; so that I wind up with a score of publications. By then, I've lost track of where I am.

Lunch was the customary Japanese restaurant. Crowded as always. But I lucked out and got a seat next to the wall at the bar. Two women came in and sat next to me. The one to my immediate left removed from her purse a plastic box containing her personal chopsticks. I made a comment that I was reminded of pool professionals who carried their own cue stick. As I babbled away, it struck me that she might take offense and stab me with one of the chopsticks. ("Team of surgeons work feverishly for hours to remove embedded chop stick.")

At the end of the bar was a tall guy that I'd chatted with before. Several weeks ago I was seated next to him, and he talked with the chef in Japanese. I gingerly asked where he'd learned the language. He said he'd lived in Japan for several years at an English instructor.

My guess is that he is gay, but I'm not exactly certain. Maybe I should try chatting him up the next time I see him. But he seems a tad reserved. Who knows?

I whisked around the corner to the post office for the mail. A letter asking me to try "GQ." And a card enticing me to the virtues of "Esquire." And a bill.

I drove off in a northerly direction headed for WalMart. County Line Road was bumper to bumper for miles in either direction. I was able to zig and zag and finally made it to the turn.

Inside I grabbed a cart and headed off to load up on cat food. WalMart has four cans for 81 cents, and with the amount I buy that offers a considerable savings over other places. The munchkins have gotten finicky of late, so I had to choose carefully.

I also needed some garbarge bags, which sounds fairly straightforward. They were not to be found in the detergent, bleach, paper towels area. I found a row of garbage cans but still no bags. A clerk told me they were in the front of the store in household goods. (Detergent, bleach and paper towels are not household goods?) Up and down the aisles I strolled, and at last there they were. And I picked up a package of 125 for $3. Not bad!

Around 7, a friend showed up for din din. I gave him the David Sedaris books for his birthday. I thought he was familiar with DS, but he said he was not.

We decided on a Japanese place near Target. But once there, we realized it was packed with a long waiting list. (There was a hand-drawn sign by the door offering a "Pink Pussy Cat" for $5.85.)

We next thrust off toward an Italian restaurant. The parking lot was full but suddenly a van pulled out and we pulled in. The nice little person behind the desk said there would be a wait of an hour. We tried to amble toward the bar, but it was cheek to jowl full.

An announcement would be made for a specific party, but no one would move. Again, and again, announcements would be made, but the parties did not appear. Did 50 people put their names down, then all leave?

We did at last get a cozy booth. We ordered. He got a salmon salad, and I scallops. We talked and tried to hear each other. But we kept having to lean across the table and shout. "DID YOU HEAR THE ONE ABOUT THE THREE NUNS, THE RABBI, THE FOOTBALL PLAYER, AND THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT?"

But all in all, it was still an enjoyable experience.

Today, I did zilch. I essentially hibernated. Not one trip to the outside world did I make. I slept. I read. I web surfed. I watched a little tv. So at least I feel rested.

PAX!